[EXERCISE] How to better your relationship with your colleagues?

Exchanging a simple glance with someone can activate the beneficial effects of social contact on our brain. In particular the effects of prosociality and improved self-awareness. The process is even used in art, by internet platforms and even NGOs. In 2016, Amnesty International Poland organised an experiment in Berlin that brought refugees from Syria and Somalia face to face with citizens from Belgium, Italy, Germany, Poland and the UK. The aim was to look into each other's eyes during 4 minutes to create intimacy. 

Improving your professional relationships by looking into each other’s eyes

On this basis, here is an exercise to improve your professional relationships. Choose a colleague with whom you want to strengthen your professional relationship - this also works with a classmate. Ask this person to do a 5-minute eye contact exercise. As this is not necessarily a very common request, you can present it as a meditative exercise for two persons. 

Exercise 

Sit down in a room with low lighting. Sit facing your partner, about 1 meter apart. Set an alarm on your phone. And spend the next 5 minutes looking into each other's eyes. Without a word, until the alarm sounds. Please note that for the exercise to work, you must not look at your phone to see how much time you have left. 

Debrief 

After these 5 minutes spent looking at each other, try to answer these questions with your partner: 

• What emotions did you feel during this exercise? 
• What were you thinking about during this exercise? 
• How did it affect your perception of yourself? 
• How did this exercise affect your perception of the person in front of you? Do you feel closer and more connected as a result of this exchange through eye contact? 

Now, in turns, you may use this prosocial moment to exchange with this person about: 

• What you enjoy most at work 
• What you enjoy least at work 
• What you enjoy most about your relationship with this person 
• What you would like to improve about your relationship with this person 

This is an ideal opportunity to discuss together how you can improve your relationship. You can end this exercise by sharing how satisfying it was (or wasn't) for you to do this exercise. And if you're really convinced, why not have a moment of relaxation around the coffee machine. After all, scientists recommend it!