How to build your professional network with confidence

If you want to get a job and have a successful career, you have to a network. Don't shoot the messenger - it's what 80% of 16,000 LinkedIn users we surveyed said. However, almost 40% of them did admit that they struggle with it.

Are you unsure about whom to contact and how? Do you think no-one will want to spend a few minutes of their precious time chatting to you or giving you career advice? Are you convinced you just don't measure up to your highly successful friends? And do you think networking is basically hell on earth?

Just stop right there - take a minute to read some of the tips I've collected from my own experience.

No, 'networking' and 'following' aren't the same thing

Before I go any further, let's make one thing clear. Networking isn't about following or connecting with 50 more people on LinkedIn every day. Having 500 connections in your professional network is good if you want to follow what's going on in your industry or keep up to date with trending topics, but if you don't actually contact them, you're not really networking.  

Working your network means meeting people and chatting with them over the phone or online, and, sometimes at least, in person. There are so many ways to network - one-on-one, over lunch, over a coffee or a drink after work, at industry networking events, on a webinar, during a masterclass or even by joining your university Alumni network, a young entrepreneurs network, or a professional club. I'll let you in on a little secret: professionals love talking about themselves, and they will be mostly happy to talk to you when you approach them. You could also ask friends and family to help you find a job, give you career advice, or help you learn new skills.  

A to do list, a decent profile, perfect timing, and reciprocity: Four tips for getting back on the networking horse 

So now you have the basics down pat. Now all you need are tips on how to get motivated and build a network that will get your career off the ground. Here are four hacks that actually work (trust me, I'm an introvert!):  

1. Have an action plan

You have to start by believing that networking really adds value - plan it as you would normally plan your day as a young professional. If you're a bit introverted or not very confident, a good action plan could really help you. Don't just rely on your feelings: go into 'project' mode and make a to do list. On a good old-fashioned Excel spreadsheet or a task management app like Trello or ClickUp, first make a list of your needs (finding out about a particular company's culture, improving your public speaking, getting to grips with interview dos and don'ts, finding your first job, finding mentors, starting a business, getting financing, etc.) Then prioritise them. Next, make a list of all the things you can do to meet these needs: get together with someone you did an internship with who has just landed a job at your dream company, join an alumni network that's organising a after-work networking event with the hottest app developers on the market, join a women's empowerment and networking group, join a young entrepreneurs network, download the Shapr networking app for start-ups that are looking to scale... you get the drift.Once you've ticked all the needs-, profile-, and event-related boxes, you can set yourself some goals, like what you want to gain from chatting with that person or helping out at that event, or the number of people or networks to contact each day. 

It's really important to set yourself goals, especially when networking isn't really your thing: once you've ticked one box, it motivates you to keep calm and carry on.Break down your efforts into smaller chunks - it will make you feel like you're making progress. 

2. Quality over quantity

To really get the most out of networking, all that's needed is the right person, at the right time, with the right level of support. Not only is there no point in creating a network with thousands of people in it, but if you have a decent profile you won't necessarily have to try and connect with the people at the top.  

For example, if you're a student looking for an internship, you could approach another intern who has a job at a company for tips. This will help you to learn more about the company culture, find out about the work, and maybe even get a message over to the recruiter.  

And whatever you do, never force the relationship. Gut feelings are so important when building a network with maximum opportunity and minimum stress.  

3. Building a network takes time

Approaching pros who you gel with is just as important as building a network over time. Why? Because generally speaking, one-day relationships don't last. At JobTeaser, for example, I recruited my very first intern from when I was working in a junior position at another company to a "Head of" role. We got on very well. We stayed in touch. We met up every so often for a couple of drinks. I followed her career path and when the opportunity arose, I thought of her.  

Keeping relationships going long term doesn't mean you have to chat every week, but you can throw in some little habits to help. You could make a note in your diary of the birthdays of people you've studied or worked with, and use the occasion as an opportunity to send them a message like: "Happy Birthday! I hope you're well. I'd love to grab a coffee with you sometime".  You could also congratulate your connections when you see on LinkedIn that they've been promoted.

4. You also have something to offer! 

Here's a bit of advice for all of you who lack confidence or are scared of bothering someone - don't forget that networking is also about taking the time to respond and chat when someone sends you a request. Believe me, you already have - or will have - something to offer. In short, networking, much like a team sport, only works when there's collaboration. 

Sending out bulk messages and being unprepared: the big don'ts! 

Attention all confident and not-so-confident networkers: there are two things to avoid. Firstly, don't send a non-personalised message to an untargeted group of people. It's obvious when you're sending bulk messages, and one thing's for sure - it never pays off. And at the very least, make sure you prepare! If you're going to send an invitation to connect with someone and take up some of their time, make sure you're clear and concise and you know what you're going to talk about and what you're going to ask.  

And just like that, you're ready to go. Don't go in with a self-serving agenda. It's about creating opportunities, not 'using' people. Networking is a two-way street. Everyone benefits, and sometimes something really good comes out of it! After all, you might just run into someone who makes you laugh or is just a really cool person. So what are you waiting for? It's time to slide into someone's DMs!